


For You

by DeathTrapDaisy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Arguing, Caring Castiel, Confused Dean, Dean in Denial, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Grumpy Castiel, Love Confessions, M/M, Momma Winchester isnt there yet?, One F-Bomb, Season/Series 11 Spoilers, Season/Series 12 Spoilers, after season 11 before season 12, slight AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-26
Updated: 2016-10-26
Packaged: 2018-08-27 05:52:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8389693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeathTrapDaisy/pseuds/DeathTrapDaisy
Summary: After the events in season 11, Dean and Castiel try to face the world again.  However, the angel seems frustrated so Dean tries to get him to spill the beans.  He may have gotten more than he bargained for.In which, Castiel makes a confession and Dean has to decide what he feels in return.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of just a little ficlet between Castiel and Dean, I wrote this before season 12 started so its somewhat AU. Also, it seemed like Cas and Dean needed a little time after the events in season 11. I wanted to include Mary but there's so many avenues that could take, so i kept this simple instead. Enjoy!

"Cas where the _Hell_ have you been?" Dean griped when the angel entered the bunker. "I've been calling you all day; Chuck just peaced out with the darkness, Sam is missing and the demons are going nuts!" Cas just looked at him exhausted and set his keys on the table.

 "What do you want me to do, _Dean_?" He grumped and Dean just spread his arms wide in a gesture of disbelief.

 "Uh I don't know, help out maybe? Help me look for my _brother_?" Cas just gave him this long suffering look.

 "Where do you think I was? I went looking for Rowena hoping she could make a tracking spell to find him but she's _gone_. I can't _fly_ so I couldn't possibly search the globe for him and out of the two of us who do _you_ think would have better success using the internet?" Dean looked surprised by the outburst but just frowned crossing his arms.

 "You know what Cas? _Blow me_ , I have done everything in my power to keep you and Sam safe and now is not the time for your bullshit, _fuckin baby in a trench coat_." Dean scoffed turning to a nearby table to grab his phone and make a few calls. Cas just stared at him and listened until Dean hung up and stared back. " _what_?"

 "Call me if you find anything, I'm _obviously_ no use to you anymore." Cas’s eyes were droopy and he turned to storm out of the bunker grabbing his keys on his way. Before Dean could even say anything he was gone.

 "What the hell was _that_ about?" Dean asked himself.

xXx

Cas got in his car to drive away frowning heavily; he missed his family, he'd fallen, he's hunted by his own kind, he let Sam get captured and Dean - Dean couldn't care _less_. After everything, he's spent all of himself for him and it's _never_ good enough. Dean never seems to understand, because Dean has Sam but Cas has no one. Cas was brought out of his thoughts when he heard his phone ringing. Sighing in vexation he glanced down to see it was Dean, he stared for a moment wondering if he had actually found something that quickly or if it was something else. His worry for Sam won out making him answer the call.

 " _Hello._ " He said gruffly without any of his usual fondness and Dean was taken aback.

 "Cas, we need to talk." Cas rolled his eyes dramatically.

 "We _are_ talking."

 "Come on, you know what I mean. Come back to the bunker." Cas hung up the phone and against his better judgement he turned the car around and went back. When he got there Dean was sitting on the couch wringing his hands with his elbows on his knees and looked up at him.

 "What is it you need to talk about?" Cas asked brusquely as he stood by the door and Dean frowned thwarted.

"Come sit down," the angel begrudgingly sat next to him and he reached out setting his hand on his shoulder. "Look, I don't know what's got you all hot and bothered but this is Sam man, we gotta put our own crap away for a while. _Understand_?" Cas scoffed shrugging his hand from his shoulder. "so, you gonna help me find him or what?"

 "I was never going to stop looking for Sam, you don't _get it_ do you? I've given enough Dean; I've given everything, my wings, my family, I've fallen, I'm hunted, I've given everything to you. Will it _ever_ be enough?" Dean looked surprised and puzzled.

 "I know you have Cas, _but_ \- no it's not enough, as long as there's another job it's _not_ enough." Cas rolled his eyes then stared down at his hands.

 "That's not what I meant." He mumbled and Dean gestured his arms wide.

 "Then _what_ Cas, talk to me?" He earnestly searched the angel’s eyes who broke the line and turned to look down. 

 "It is not of importance, we need to find Sam." Cas mumbled trying to stand but Dean caught him by the elbow and made him stay.

 "We will but we're not getting up from here until you tell me what's going on." Cas glanced at Dean; his eyes were so gentle and green, his brows furrowed in concern. Cas couldn't believe he was putting him first, wanted to make sure he was okay before they started working and something in Cas broke. He knew Dean cared, he knew Dean had given as much as him or more to the cause. He drooped in his seat as if Dean could sense the change he placed a warm hand on his knee.  "Cas." The angel gazed into his eyes.

 "Dean, you realize you and Sam are all I have?" Dean looked staggered like he hadn't thought of it before. "I meant, will it ever be enough for you - to _love me_?" Dean's heart broke and his eyes turned sad. Squeezing Cas's knee softly he gave a sad smile.

 "I do love you Cas, maybe I always have. _I don't know_." Cas knew the kind of love he was talking about - it was the platonic kind. But Cas is pretty sure that's not what he felt for Dean; not when he thought of his green eyes and soft lips, or wanting to hold him close and shelter him during the night. All those things Dean would never let him do in a million years. In his hesitation, he noticed Dean grow a little more anxious the longer he waited.

 "I mean _really_ love me, Dean. Like I love you."  Cas cautiously moved his fingers between Dean's that were still clasped around his knee and observed him slowly process the information. He was actually astounded that he didn't jump up from the couch and run from the entire situation. He waited patiently as Dean struggled to sift through his thoughts and find what he needed to say.

 "I - there's nothing you can do to make me feel that way." Cas's heart was breaking, he knew it was true but never thought he'd hear it straight from his lips. "you can't give everything and sacrifice everything to make someone love you, Cas, you just can't. They'll love you if they love you and they won't if they won't." He shrugged defeated and Cas pulled away and stood slouched staring at the door of the bunker. He was considering running out and never looking back but even if Dean didn't love him, he loved Dean and couldn't leave knowing Sam was in danger. " _Cas?_ "

"We should look for Sam." Cas glanced over his shoulder and Dean seemed relieved but at the same time he knew their talk hadn't fixed anything.

 "Okay, I guess we should start by looking for someone that matches your description maybe someone had seen her around town." Cas nodded his back facing him then headed for the door.

 "I'll make inquiries." Dean watched him go and sighed, his heart felt heavy cause he _did_ love Cas. He just didn't think he loved him like _that_.

xXx

They split up all day searching and not finding much. It was late and Dean was exhausted, he headed back to the bunker and had dinner and a shower but there was no sign of Cas. He waited a few hours before he called him.

 "Cas, we've been looking all day. Why don't you come back and take a rest?”

 "Angels don't need-"

 " _Rest_ I know, just come home. _Please_?" Cas hesitated on the other side before he sighed quietly.

 "Alright." Then hung up, Cas didn't know if Dean just felt guilty or if he just didn't want to be alone in the bunker but Cas always came when he called.

xXx

When Cas got there, Dean was already in his room. Cas looked through the small crack of his door where he was sleeping on the bed, one hand behind his head and the other over his stomach. He lingered for a little too long knowing if Dean were awake he would get pissed at him for just watching but Cas found it hard to care. He ogled his chest slowly rise and fall with breaths, the tufts of soft hair sticking wildly each way as the bedside fan blew cool air throughout the room. The blanket around his waist and a plain white t-shirt.

The brunette smiled softly when Dean started snoring quietly. He wished he could enter the room; run fingers through his soft hair, kiss his perfectly shaped nose and watch over him so he knows he is safe. He must've lost track of time when his thoughts began to wander because next he knew Dean was gazing tiredly back. He didn't bark an annoyance, or grumble in infuriation, he just watched him. Cas's breath caught, Dean frowned slowly shifting just a little so he could see better.

 "What are you doing?" Cas asked after a long while because he was just waiting for Dean to tell him to leave.

 "Watching you." Though deep his voice sounded much softer than usual, Cas's brows furrowed perplexed and Dean scooted over on the bed lifting the covers. "c'mere." He beckoned softly, eyes shifting timidly and Cas graciously moved into the room and laid down in the bed, it was warm where Dean had been. They laid facing each other, Cas with his hands under his cheek and Dean with one under his pillow the other on his own elbow.  They gazed at one another for a while, Cas could tell there was something weighing heavily on the other man’s mind.

 " _Dean._.?" Dean shook his head reaching over to take Cas's hand from under his cheek pulling it between them and wrapped it tightly in his own.

 "You shouldn't give everything to make someone love you Cas, it's not fair.... _But,_ that doesn't mean it didn't work." Cas smiled slowly and tears formed in his eyes. "I love you Cas and I promise to tell you more often even if it's _hard_ because you have given everything for me. You deserve to hear it."

 "You don't have to Dean. You don't have to do anything because I will always love you." Dean ran his thumb over his knuckles tilting forward to kiss them and some tears of his own started to form.

 "Can you watch over me, Cas? Just do it from here?" The vulnerability in his eyes made Cas's heart throb, he nodded and Dean uncertainly moved closer burying his head against his chest. Doubtfully Cas wrapped his arms around his shoulders running his fingers through soft tousled hair. Dean felt much smaller in his arms than he had expected and he enfolded himself tight around the angel’s abdomen, sturdy hands clutched in his shirt between his shoulder blades just underneath his trench coat. Dean took in his scent which smelled like incense and wild flowers. Cas cautiously pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

 "I will _always_ watch over you, Dean."

xXx

Once they found Sam, he noticed something was altered between them. He was used to the brash conversations and Dean making fun of Cas which he still did occasionally but something was off. At first he thought they had a fight but Dean looked at him different and spoke softer. Sam finally learned undeniably when he saw them cuddled together in Dean's bed; Dean on his back and Cas on his side watching over him with his hand brushing through his hair. They shared a couple caring kisses when Cas placed one on the tip of his nose, Dean blushed abashed at the tenderness of that gesture and hid his head beneath the angels chin. "Good night, _babe_." Was muffled against his chest and Cas chuckled quietly laying a kiss on the top of his head.

 "Good night, Dean."

 The door was open so Sam knew they weren't hiding it and smiled flicking off the hallway light before climbing into his own bed across the hall. He shook his head with an amused laugh and couldn't stop smiling.

The end.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this, i have a butt load of spn fics in the works but cant seem to get them straightened out. This was my first Cas/Dean that has stayed posted anyway.


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